S

Self-Led

an app for connection

You've done the work. You know your parts. Now meet people who get what that actually means.

let's build your profile

hi, you 👋
a few things first

pick as many as feel true — no pressure to have it figured out

💛 dating
🤝 friendship
🌿 community

no right answer — everyone's path looks different

📚 read a book
🛋️ in therapy
🎙️ podcast / video
🌱 self-exploring
👥 coaching
🔍 still curious
choose a prompt for your profile

tap a starter to edit, or write your own ↓

honestly, my inner critic had a lot of opinions about me downloading this app. we negotiated. here i am 😄 a part of me is ready for real connection, even if another part is a little nervous about it i'm still figuring out what i want — and learning to be okay with that

✨ no therapy-speak required. no right answers. parts welcome.

⚙

a connection

you both said yes ✨

💬 a thought

your connections

people who said yes back

local events

in-person gatherings near you

coming up

Sat, Jun 7 · 2pm14 going

IFS Walk & Talk

📍 Prospect Park, Brooklyn NY

outdoorslow-keyall welcome
Sun, Jun 15 · 4pm8 going

Parts Mapping Circle

📍 The Loft, Portland OR

facilitatedsmall group
Fri, Jun 20 · 6:30pm22 going

Self-Led Social — Summer Kickoff

📍 Backyard Coffee, Austin TX

casualsocialall welcome

host your own

bring people together

a walk, a dinner, a book club, a parts circle — anyone can host.

M
Maya
friendship · dating

learn & explore

IFS for every entry point

📖 books to start with

📘
No Bad Parts
Richard Schwartz · 2021
The clearest intro to IFS. Schwartz explains the model through story and dialogue — no therapy background needed.
💛
You Are the One You've Been Waiting For
Richard Schwartz · relationships edition
IFS applied to love and partnership. Essential if you're here for dating — it reframes what we're really looking for in others.
🛠️
Self-Therapy
Jay Earley
A practical workbook for doing IFS on your own. Great if you're self-led or curious and not in therapy.
🌿
Parts Work
Tom Holmes
An illustrated, gentle intro to working with parts. Very accessible if IFS is brand new to you.

🎙️ podcasts & audio

🎧
IFS Talks
Tammy Sollenberger
Warm and conversational — Tammy interviews practitioners and people doing the work. Great for commutes.
🎙️
Being Well
Rick & Forrest Hanson
Covers IFS alongside other approaches to emotional wellbeing. Accessible, research-grounded, human.

🌐 find support & community

🏛️
IFS Institute
ifs-institute.com
The official home of IFS. Includes a practitioner directory if you want to work with a therapist or coach.
🤝
r/InternalFamilySystems
Reddit community
A warm, active community of people doing the work — beginners to long-timers. Great for questions and sharing.

✨ the 8 Cs of Self

a reminder for your connections
Calm · Curiosity · Clarity · Compassion · Confidence · Courage · Creativity · Connectedness — these are what show up when we're relating from Self. You'll recognize them in your best conversations. 🌿

🆘 if you need support

crisis resources
📞 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline — call or text 988
💬 Crisis Text Line — text HOME to 741741
🏠 Domestic Violence Hotline — 1-800-799-7233

Self-Led is a community, not a clinical service.
Resources here don't replace professional support.